suffer peace

i wish everyone would just come out and say what they mean, what they feel. i hate the masks we wear. i wish people would get over themselves ("people" includes me) and go out on a limb to be OPEN. i admire and respect and appreciate openness so much it's ridiculous. i can't stand the pride we bear. it's killing us. i'd rather be open and vulnerable and a vessel for Christ's love and truth than "cool," sophisticated and blinded by pride (or self-consciousness--which stems from PRIDE). even now i am holding back from what i truly want to say because of what people might think of me. i'm sorry i am the way i am. i'm like a freakin puzzle with pieces missing, so i can't expect people to understand me, but they could TRY.
the winds are picking up God, i don't know how much longer i can hang onto that thread you've given me.

That there is pain...
That this world is pain...
How the whole earth growns until love's return
Until Love returns.

To deal...
To face the darkness...
To face the darkness and
return
Not unscathed
not unwounded,
But Free.
With the Truth.
--With some semblance of truth.

Salom
In the beginning was the Word
Salaam
And the Word was with God
Selam
And the Word was God
Selam
The Word was with God in the beginning
And the Word was One.
Shalom

To face deceit
with a soul intact
with a mind salvaged
--saved from the racks

"Life is pain
Highness.
Anyone who says differently
is selling
something."

Where are you
Saviour
In this mire?
In this gloom
blood-thick and dire?

I AM.
I AM here in the midst of it.
I AM the fire.

I AM the salt in the tears
that fall.

I weep with you
For you
I AM the weeping.

I created the thorn
Upon that brow
my brow
your brow
The nation's brow
I AM the thorn.

In turmoil
In bitter strife
In pain
...when strivings cease
...in the cessation of pain
I weep with you.

I AM the SUFFERER
who surrendered.
You have not known me by that name
I will speak to you My Name
The name SUFFERER
Burden-Taker
Martyr-King
--That you might know me as LORD.


Peace to you, fellow sufferers.